QUOTE OF THE TURN: [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=190543][COLOR=purple]Nih Betodaru[/COLOR][/url]

Quote: "Loki... I'm not going to discuss this further with you. The matter is closed, as far as I'm concerned."

Awee I accept your apology, friend! Though a hug would have been okay too!

This turn, I spoke little with my best friend but a lot with Ellyana.. I finally did it.. I told them, Pallas, and Elly, they know who I am.. or well- who I was. James..Jimmy, that's me. I'm not sure if Elly is upset with me, though she said I will forever be her Green-Buddy, I'm still quite nervous about her. All I want is for them to have peace and happiness, that's all. Pallas finally thanked me, It was shocking! I thought I was once again at the brink of death, I was honestly really scared, but I knew I wasn't a bandit anymore, so he wouldn't kill me.. It made me extremely happy to have shook that mans hand in a thank you, despite the words that slipped from Ellyana, I was just happy to see that she was alive, regardless if she liked me or not, she is a very strong woman.


Friendship, is important to me.. I once cried for a whole turn because I thought I was done for, going to lose my best friend.. but that wasn't the case, it was a misunderstanding, but boy, I could have caused some serious damage.. and I thank Viviyan for that, and for being around i general.

So much thinking to do, my head is starting to hear and make me sleep more, but I will get my actors, I will!

despite the fact of everything, I spoke with Lotus at the end of last turn, she's very sweet.. I want to thank her for being around, especially when needing someone to talk to.

I... am in a dilemma, but I will not write of it. It's rather confusing.

Also, my hair is dyed teal at the ends. YAY!!

That's about it!

Contemplating, plotting, and planning

A True Story

The last turn, no, the turn before the last, I ran... I ran and searched for Elenoire, and I wasn't going to have anyone with me, no, there was no need to have anyone with me. I had to do this on my own, not because Elenoire is a friend, but because it involved bandits. As soon as I heard the story, I knew bandits were involved, there couldn't have been any other.. Abduction, that's what their known for, and so, I moved on, leaving my sister's congratulations for leveling party and going to search for the fragile one. Valya had the doors blocked, but luckily Lavender was there, and so I asked her to use her portal to teleport me to Branishor, where I could think and plan better. Walker.. a very strong rogue, he wanted to help, but I wasn't going to allow it; I couldn't allow another to get hurt while I dealt with the bandits, No One knows them as good as I, and I was aware of this. But of course, he followed me anyway, through the portals we went, and toward the Gremlins camp I went to think. I fought through the gremlins to reach their attic, where I knew no one would be able to reach me. It was then I planned.. to Ethucan, because that's where they would be- but it wasn't the first stop. The bandits would know I would be heading there, so I had to make an abnormal turn, Killican. I somehow managed to lose Walker, he called me a fool, though he knew why I did what I had, however, on my journey, I bumped right into Nih. He was standing right on the roads of Caernival, it was as if he knew I was going to go there. "What are you doing?" He asked me, I almost hesitated to answer him, not really sure how he would take my behavior, and not really sure if Nih knew exactly what was going on with Elenoire. And so I told him; "I have a ferry to catch.. Elenoire's missing, Nih, and I have to find her. Bandits." When I said this, there was no need to finish, because Nih understood right away; "Well then what are we waiting for? Lets go." What was the wait? Why did I hesitate so much? It took me awhile, but then after awhile, I figured out why. I had to.. literally revert back to banditry, remembering what we they would have did, what trails we they would have left. It took awhile but I got it. I told Nih to make sure that I do the talking, and he didn't care what I did, as long as we found Elenoire.

When we made it to Killican, the place was so quiet, way too quiet from the norm, so I knew something fishy was up. I kept feeling like their were eyes on me.. I was ready, I wanted to slaughter every single bandit if I seen one, but none showed up.. it was until then, when I realized that they left us a note hidden the mug of a Pirate Ale on sale. So I ordered it. "Once lost, now found, Around and 'round you go, place a price and we'll sell" I can't hardly remember the words... they were something like that! I was highly upset, once I realized that they had us spinning in circles.. back in the Wastelands, that's where we had to go, and so Nih contacted Lavender and we portal'ed our way there, and that's where we bumped into Jobe. The two followed me into the wastelands, and made it to the Tainted Obelisk of Salvation, I knew for a fact that's where we would have met as a bandit, I knew that's where they could have been... but they was not. They sold Elenoire away, that poor soul, and we was too late. I knew this when I found a Mire Gem, and where could they have gotten that? They were playing with us.. torturing us with our own knowledge, somebody was watching.. they knew I would find the trail, but consistently left hints.. why? Who is playing these mind games? I sincerely hope it isn't Master Rai.. he was the bandit captain I knew, and if that was the case.. then he's haunting me. If he continues to play games, I will show him who changed, using my Warrior blade. So we went to the Hag, she always gives away Mire Gems.. and found nothing but a scared old ugly woman. I was disgusted, seeing that the trail ended there. Though Loki told me to kill her and get the information, but I couldn't.. because, somehow, I had a feeling that's exactly what the bandits wanted. They wanted to see if I could kill something to take on for the blame. They wanted to see if I was still that blood thirsty.. But what they didn't understand, was that I didn't do it because I wanted to, but because I HAD to. Nih was upset, and needed to spend time with the shadows, and that in itself was understandable... it truly was... and so, we're left with a burden in our hearts, waiting to hear more news about Eleneoire... but nothing yet, only marcs, patience is a virtue. I thought I was losing my mind.. so I stopped taking the tonic, now more becoming a bandit again, though I feel the need that I have to.. in order to help save Elen.

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=191014][COLOR=purple]Order Adjutant Viviyana[/COLOR][/url]

Quote: "Hey Loki, I've found out where I don't fit in, how do find where I do?"

VIVI's BACK!!! I'M SO HAPPY!!
Anyways, me and Vivi spoke a lot this turn, and I'm happy to have done just that. I didn't realize how much I missed her until toturn.
She asked me this question.. I remember asking this to myself actually, long ago.
Many do not know of my history, but for my friends who do know exactly what I'm talking about.. ugh... it killed me, the memories.. I swear it. I thought that I would have been dead, but I survived somehow.. I ran, and just kept running, climbed and just kept climbing, though I can't help it but to feel that soon, soon the bandits will haunt me again, and I will have to fight them. If they do, I'm ready for it. I'll take them all, just like that Warrior did, wiping out each and every one of them with my blade. But when Vivi asked me this, she made me remember the answer.. the reason why I'm so happy.

I told her; "Don't try to fit in, it's too much work, I like to live my life by going with the flow and continuing with what makes me happy."
Who care about fitting in, being that unique puzzle is what matters.

[URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=190160][COLOR=blue]Avedis[/COLOR][/URL], I confused him so, though not intentionally.. trust me, it really wasn't my intentions.

So Vivi came back and the weirdest thing happened... a funeral, for a.. outfit? Man oh man, wait till Harkyne hears about this! They called it, The Legend of Stormy Sunset,, at least this is what [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=41087][COLOR=red]Rea[/COLOR][/URL] called it. You guys, I'm not over exaggerating when I say, the funeral was literally for an outfit.

I am so happy Bebh is back. I've missed her so much, and now both Bebh and Vivi's back? My life is almost complete! Almost..

I spent a lot of time with Lotus this turn.. didn't realize how amazing she was. I can't wait to get to know her some more.

By far this turn has been the most embarrassing for me, OH NIH, WHAT TO DO?!
P.S: I know you're reading this..
P.S.S: I can see you from far away in the distance of shadows!!

Highlight of this entire page;
I * Viviyana's back!
II * The Legend of Stormy Sunset
III * Embarrassing turns.

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=82135][COLOR=purple]Lady Sehdae Ly[/COLOR][/URL]

Quote: "Inebriated? You're acting worse than Cenny when I snuck him the lemonkade's from the hall."

FRIENDS, If I ever forget, please remind me to never drink mead, ever again! I sort of just kept writing Sehdae, oh man, she probably hates me now. Though she was trying to help me a lot, she stopped me from dancing and also taking a canon ride which probably wouldn't end well. Thank you Sehdae!

Despite the fact that I drank mead, I actually had lots of fun last turn! Spoke with so many people, and the last turn before was actually funny as well.. Houtini Foofinnweson, odd fellow yet still rather intriguing. Soon, if everything goes accorded to my plan, I will be doing business with this man. If I ever see him again!

I waltzed last turn... I waltzed to nothing, but with someone, and it was fun! I hope to spend more time with that one.

I've been writing a lot recently, and remembering a lot. No more reliving my past, thank goodness! I've got so many plans, it's exciting! Just wait and see you all will enjoy it.

Me and Valya has discovered so much, which is also exciting, and my student Petiron has been training hard. I am pleased, very much so! Though Marron's concerned at how I've been passing out.. I've been doing that sense I can remember, it's nothing I can control really. I'm happy from all the support I've been receiving, thank you friends.


Shadows leads, light follows.

"I radiated a: Battlebringer`s Mark of Kane`s Fury" blessing..

Different for me... I wonder what that was all about?


I really miss Ellyana... can't wait to speak with her again. Get well soon Elly.

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=190543][COLOR=purple]Nih Betodaru[/COLOR][/url]

Quote: "Then Loki, you and I will always be friends. Your past is one of atrocity, but you overcame it. For that, I am proud of you."

Words cannot... They just can't I tried, but they CAN'T!
I can't say thank you, he tells me I don't have to because he already knows that I am thankful.
Nih... I'm your BIGGEST FAN best friend! He sees that.. what else can I say to him?
He broke me down, that WrinkledSuitDirtSharkNestHead-Pup..

Nothing even phased him, not even those words. I couldn't even write; Turn Two in my journal on the second turn. I've been... reliving my past. It's painful.. I remember every single thing, I haven't been so scared to relive the horrible times of banditry, I didn't even realize I had forgotten so much in the beginning. I refuse to go further into my history, only because it isn't for everyone to know. But it kills me, it really does. Nih even slapped me out of it. I don't know what I would do without Nih. Speaking of Nih, sense we were ALREADY on the "Topic Of Nih", I think I scared him!! I THINK I ACTUALLY SCARED HIM! Well- not like scare-scare but more like startled, and boy was it worth it. Every.Single.Time he comes out of nowhere to me saying my name; HOLY DIRT UNDER THE SHOES OF ZERIC'S! It's so scary unexpectedly - What would be a good word? And No, I wasn't scared; I wasn't scared at all. It Though it was hilarious how I did it, the conversation was short, it went something like;

I was tiptoeing my way to Nih, and then out of nowhere I shouted his name; "NIH!"
He doesn't jump.. he doesn't yelp.. he just simply looks at me with narrowed eyes and said; "No." That's it... no?
I fell over laughing so hard! I just knew I startled him! I had to.. and you wanna know what his response was?
The shark-Cleric, lifted his old cane and actually pointed it toward me, and repeated himself; "No"... At this exact moment, I felt like a dog. I felt like I did something wrong! But I know, I did nothing wrong, still, I apologized, a few times actually; I think. I know I scared him!!

"[URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=192728][COLOR=blue]Houtini Foofinnweson[/COLOR][/URL]" Now THIS was a very interesting adventurer. Our conversation.. was the most confusing! I welcomed him to Valorn.. and he says;
"Hello to you too! Who are you? Hou, really. Ha! That's me!" - So I said; "Well hello Hou!".
His response was; "Hou who? I'm who, that's Hou! Houtini is me! But you can call me Foofinnweson!" Confused.. right at this very moment, so I said; "So it's Foofinnweson?" I said.
"That's right, laddie! Foofinnweson!" Was his response - For one, he actually knew I was a guy; YES! So I say it's nice to meet you, and then introduce myself.
"Who? Ha! Houtini Foofinnweson is who, is who!" - Oh man.. what was this guy even saying anymore?!
I said; "Well it's nice to meet you!" And he responded; "It is? I mean, it is! Who, who, who are you, since you aren't Hou who?"
I introduced myself for the last time.. and his response was; "Loki, Loki, Pokey, Moki, Roki, Soki, oh what a fun name!" - WHAT? "Loki, Loki, Loki. Fun to say! And rhyme!"
Why are you DOING this Foofinswagon Foofinnweson? WHY? STAUP!!

All in all, this turn was interesting. I spoke to [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=7797][COLOR=teal]Doyle[/COLOR][/URL] a lot this turn, probably, the second longest conversation I've ever had with the stone, he's honestly a really funny guy! He told me about his past, so he was a farmer? I knew it! There was something about him that had that farmer-like vibe, though he had a very good life.

I had apologized to [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=173295][color=black]Kenji[/color][/URL] again.. he had congratulated me when I leveled to thirty-seven.. his words were; "It is no more.. but live in thankfulness that it was.. My hair will grow back in time." - Very strong, I respect this man. I hope that he can forgive me completely.
Kabolloi I also apologized too, she also accepted my apology, though told me to stay away for awhile, and so I agreed and simply walked away. If one wants their space, then so be it, I will not force someone to speak with me.

Valya is amazing, the most amazing sister anyone could ever have. I've so far told her everything about me, she's the best. And although we lived completely different lives, we are still alike in many ways. Da had very strong genes haha!

Lillya actually could relate to me, she said she was proud of me also, Thank you Lil.

Oh and Sehdae said; "Intriguing? I believe, Loki, you find everything intriguing. Loki the Intrigued" - Hilarious Ha! She's amazing.

And so, after hallucinating and reliving my past, I've decided to take a turn break from the tonic. No more until the next turn.
Thank you [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow97718.html][COLOR=green]Bebh[/COLOR][/URL].. [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow23924.html][COLOR=darkgreen]Marron[/COLOR][/URL]..

I will never forget my goal. I am a protector of the lands. I am Loki, the shadows know..

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=192468][COLOR=purple]Valya[/COLOR][/URL]

Quote: "What if we WERE related? You don't know anything about your family...."

Who am I? What am I?
Family.... What is that?
The only ones who've accepted me into theirs were the Bunny's. I love them.. my family.. but a sister? Do I actually have one? A real blood related sister?!

-

[url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=190543][COLOR=darkgreen]Nih[/COLOR][/url] - "Loki... If you begin to remember something that is painful, just stop taking the tonic. Okay? Otherwise, two drops in an ale, twice a turn, you'll be remembering everything"

Day One.. Two drops of that awkward brown liquid in my ale.. I'm scared, honestly.. but I want this.

[URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=191286][COLOR=teal]Achelle[/COLOR][/URL] - Be careful with memories Loki...we suppress things for a reason. Have my share of them.

Thank you 'Chelle, I will make sure I am careful. I will make sure that on this path to memory lane, that I proceed with caution. My head hurts.. it hurts so bad, I've been thinking way too much. But I have to.

[url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=185847][COLOR=blue]Lillya[/COLOR][/url]- The brain is very fickle at times Loki taking what memory it wants

Why does it hide the things that are most important? Or at least it was..? It just doesn't make sense. All I want is to figure out who I am.. Where did I come from? Previous to banditry, who was in my life?

Valya - Then you tell me what you remember, and I'll record it. You might not remember in order, you know....it might be bits here and there...

Thank you Valya.. I appreciate your support, I really do.

I have this odd feeling though.. it's in my gut.. and it feels like it's reaching into my insides and twisting it counter clockwise. What is it that the shadows are hiding from me..? Happiness?
No, Loki. That wouldn't make sense. If the shadows were hiding happiness, then would I not be happy now?
So then, what are you hiding from me..? SADNESS?
Am I to be in the dark forever more? Not unless the goal is to be there.. it's not like I have a problem with it. Though if I wish to truly be myself, I must Learn Myself.

Fire...
I did a mistake this turn, after brainstorming, I actually lit fireworks incorrectly inside of Dundee's Inn. What was I THINKING?! I burned Kabolloi, and AND Kenji, ruined the Inn. I wouldn't be surprised if Jeffrey's even upset with me. Regardless, I apologized to both, and told [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=191246][COLOR=red]Kairiel[/COLOR][/url] - The Fiery One; of my mistake.. she called me an Idiot.. Idiot? Suppose I'm in the art of Idiotry, after lighting something like that in a closed in area. I cleaned up my mess, but she was upset.. though I didn't quite understand, Zanaan seemed to have lit fire in the In before me, and it was perfect! But then I did, and made a mess.

Kairiel then hugged me, I suppose she seen how pitiful I looked. I must admit, I felt horrible. After the hug, she said that she'd have to teach me safety, and so she did! But.. I've ruined my hair. It's shorter now.. just as I ruined Kenji's. It hurt, and although it did, I still laughed. But not Kenji-Warrior, he was upset.

The Fiery One had me looking for her, I failed the first time.. mistaking the riddle for a regular question. HOW did I DO THAT?! I never mistake riddles! But I did.. and failed. I asked for a second chance, and that time I was right. I searched and found her successfully.

After I found her, she told me to ask any question, and so I did. I asked her; "How do you successfully light a firework?" And she explained to me in grand detail.. so I told her I would light my other, and I did.. and when I did, it burst perfectly! It.. was [COLOR=green]GREEN[/COLOR]! I was super happy.. I mean, beyond Happy. Afterwards, Kairiel demonstrated juggling fire, and then her most dangerous move; Fire-breathing.

She told me... that the next lesson is patience, though I thought that was the first, it became the next. Patience plays a big part with fire, and fire is possible to be someone's best friend.. soon it will be mine. For Fire casts many shadows, and shadows is what I've yearned, fire is what I've yearned.

I will become one with fire. I will become one with Patience.

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [COLOR=purple]Gibberish[/COLOR]

Quote: "nkjfhkdflfds"

Yes.. that's exactly what it looks like. Gibberish. And that's not even a person!


The last few turns.. I don't even know. I can't explain. Too much excitement. WHERE TO START?!

For one; Commander Hojo asks of my turns twice. I can't wait to get to know him some more! I'm excited to have new friends, all of the many. Each and every one of them are exciting. I'm just happy that I've been speaking with Achelle more.... she reads me like a book. I've never known someone to know me so well. It's kind of scary, but I like it. Was that creepy..? I'm thinking about scratching that.

Anyways: Lighting lanterns and watching them fly.. that was two turns ago. I will never forget that turn. I lit three, one for myself, another for Marron, and the last for Bebhinn.. I miss her.

Where has Bebh gone..? I've never felt so empty.. With her gone, it's made me realize how much attention I've paid to her, let alone everyone else. Favoritism is bad, it was not that.. however, I must have spoke to her more than any other. I remember the time when me and her both expressed ourselves to each other, not romantically, but just out of friendship.. we both had our doubts, but it worked out in the end and brought us closer. I wouldn't be surprised if she's gone and about, chasing after the stars. Perhaps finally seeing her family, just like Viviyana?

Ellyana approached me last turn, she asked if I seen her as a friend? Silly question coming from my Green Buddy. Why wouldn't I? She doesn't know how much I care about her and Ni. Pallas is a great man, I'm happy that she has him, and I respect in in general as a person. It brings me joy every time I see those two together. It makes me just want to squeal, as if I were watching a Play. I should write one based off of them two, and call it Pana and Ellas... You seen what I did there? - Teehee.

I just had the most awkwardest conversation with Avedis.. and if I'M calling it awkward, then YES IT'S EXTREMELY AWKWARD. Nothing's awkward to me.. nothing. But when it is.........

I approached the male with a simple Hi, and it started off exactly like that- though for some reason this man is always stuttering La.. LA? What in the dirt of Zeric's shoes is LA?!

Avedis said: "Hello, la--... Loki."
'La Loki', I suppose that could be a title? I just smiled at the male and asked him how was his turn, before simply asking mentioning fish, and so he said; "Aye - explains everything." - He sounded so dry and sarcastic.. was he?
I asked; Of course, COOKED FISH! Do you like fish?!" - So he says; "You make no sense, lad."
How was it that I made no sense?! I just want to pull my hair... I don't get it! So I responded;
"I do?" confusedly before saying; "Well do you like fish?" while stepping near!
So he responds; "I do like fish." while leaning back. I offered him fish!

And then no response. How awkward was that? HUH?

Sir Cody did the same thing. He first questioned me with Fish, and then said that he'd hope it's cooked. I offered, NO RESPONSE.

WHY WON'T ANYONE ACCEPT MY FISH? I WAS BEING SO KIND, AND I LOVE FISH. FINE, MY FISH!!!!

In other stories; I took the Crier's job last turn. He wasn't spreading news to well. Besides, everybody wants to know what the Queen said during the Audience. Those who are reading that are interested, contact me if you wish to know. I don't think I'll scream though, the Crier has all of that. My voice would scratch and I would need tea for turns. I completely dislike tea.. so much.

Nih is the best.
Achelle is awesome.
Valya is epic.
Marron is BEYOND WORDS.
Aryana is just cool.
Cody is SirCodyFirebladeAwesomeStuff.
Ellyana is sweetyEpicFunGreenBuddy.

KAIRIEL - Now that's someone to talk about. Thanks to her, I have a GREEN DULL CRYSTAL. I am the happiest person ever, I assure you. One can't explain, even I can't. She showed me around Miranda's temple and Stre-something, I don't know how to write it nor pronounce it. But the place as amazing.. I can't wait for more exciting adventures with Kai. Truly honored to have met such an entertaining yet intriguing friend. She's amazing!

If I write anymore, surely, I'll run out of paper. This pretty much sums up everything. Thank you for reading!

Highlight of this entire page;
I * Adventuring with Kairiel
II * Ellyana
III * Lanterns
IV * HOJO APPROACHING ME FIRST

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=192621][COLOR=purple]Petiron[/COLOR][/URL]

Quote: "What do I do with a gift kit from Ridder?"

You all are probably like.. "Loki, why is THAT the quote of the turn?" But this was... one of the best turns of my life. Why? Because I received the best hat in all of Valorn from my student. A HORNED ALE HAT, I AM THE ALE KING!!!! The new one anyways. Even Thias [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=5693]Xanthias[/URL] agree.
He said; "Ah, well then, hail to the king."[SIZE=-1] Teehee[/SIZE]. Also, I made my student an Official Warrior last turn.. perfect.

Why is it that I'm always subjected to.. not strange behavior, though there's always a turn with something so strange.
I spoke with her.. or whether she spoke with me. Apparently, she did not approve of my words. So now I'm at lost.. I lost a friend. This was heart breaking. I never thought that I would, but maybe she'll come back? Maybe..? My words were harsh My words seemed harsh, however they were not. They were the right words to say. My words was complete honesty. Some know how to accept, some don't, that's what happens.

I have been speaking with [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=178759][COLOR=blue]Cody[/COLOR][/URL] a lot more recently.. man he's so intimidating! Though, he's the best. I'm happy to be this close to my teacher, and will soon be even closer. The Gods have a plan for me, why else would they give me an ale hat with horns?

[URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=191103][COLOR=darkgreen]Cenny[/COLOR][/URL] and [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=192468][COLOR=teal]Valya[/COLOR][/URL] are the best... I'm happy to have them both in my life. Sometimes I feel that a small "Thank You" isn't enough for the many wonderful friends I have.

I have Cenny's journal!! Yay!!! NO I'M NOT TELLING YOU ANYTHING ABOUT IT.... mine.
Cenny actually allowed me to hug him more than once. I can't tell you all how content I am right now. Despite the sadness of this turn. I thank my friends the most.

You wanna know what else happened? I won the contest to Zanaan's attire event! Fweeeeee 5k PLAT!

Nih actually came when I asked him to. After pushing him a bit.. I have so much respect for him!

There are only a few I say I love to, and you all know who you are. Thank you.

Highlight of this entire page;
I * Horned Ale Hat.
II * Cenny, Valya & Cody
III * The Journal!!
IV * Attire Contest

[SIZE=-1]Can you see it..? Can you see me?[/SIZE]

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=191246][COLOR=purple]Kairiel Bosburn[/COLOR][/URL]

Quote: "Ah-huh. Wildfire. Different from demonfire, though. Wildfire leaves the maybe for something."

It took me awhile.. a long while. But when I finally understood that I was the medium; Me? Shadow no, why? Why are you putting me through this?

Normally I wouldn't dare question the tasks, normally I wouldn't dare second guess myself. I would just listen. When you tell me to go, I will Go. But I didn't.. I stopped. There was a pause. Why was there a pause? Could I be lost without the whispers? But how? I was doing so well before. Before I could hear your whispers out loud, I survived. Is it because I am the conflict? The conflict wasn't really others.. it twas myself. I was battling against me; My worst enemy.

I.. scared myself.. I felt so in rage, pure fire like none other. I felt I just had to do something. I HAVE TO.. but no. No Loki, if you did something, then you would cause more chaos; But isn't chaos good? Of course it tis. Chaos is balance. But wouldn't chaos be light.. not dark? Some often get it confused. I surely know that I am not. Light is a chaotic element, no one sleeps in bright light, everyone is calmer, and less chaotic in the dark. So no, the darkness wasn't confusing I, it twas me; My Light. Lo..Low.. I have to keep to myself, this is what I thought; that is what I did. And in that moment, all I could do is plot. Chaos tis all... Darkness tis all.. What was I saying? That isn't all. But my eyes defied me, I could not see anymore but that. I could see war.. bloodshed, so much bloodshed, though did it effect me? No. I wanted it. I craved it.. but that's not me. Every now and then I could hear Cody's words. He said to me; "Hey, I've heard a lot of good things about you. Whenever you need someone to talk to, come to me.. I'm proud of you, Loki.." - Did I answer him? No.. why hadn't I answered him? I couldn't. I wanted to but I felt like I couldn't speak, like I no longer had a voice. Suffocation.

I was told to stay out of his business.. I couldn't speak, though I wanted to... Suffocation. Why were you there.... Aryana...? Why didn't you just walk away? She said something to me.. I told her to stay away. I could hurt her, I could cause her pain. Tis only chaos.. tis-.. did she say I was apart of her family..?

He touched my shoulder.. and told me; "Whatever you do.. just don't allow it to change who you are.. I don't like to see you so... down? You're always happy. Don't ever change you." Sir Cody.. I'm sorry.. forgive me for not responding. I am still very apologetic.

Ary.. I'm sorry for acting like such a fool..
My friends worked it out in the end, and all they needed was a reminder.. I lashed out. I lashed.. I was about to face my death with the blade of my own best friend. I was ready for it. I wanted the terrors to stop, I wanted the torture to leave. Though regardless.. I refused to be the one to walk away from it. I rather be the one that bleeds while still facing it.


[SIZE=-2]-Scribbles-[/SIZE]

Everything's okay now... everything's okay.
I'm okay.. I don't want to be enraged no more. It scares me.
I've discovered a fear of mine. I can be a monster.
I am a Dark Warrior...
I am a protector..

The shadows consumed me.. the shadows vaporize me.. the shadows know what they're doing.

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [URL=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow192338.html][COLOR=green]Loki Jester[/COLOR][/URL]

Quote: "It would seem tis was the topic of the turn. History.~"

Nih Betodaru;
Foods; Plain Cat Blood and Grass; It tastes bland. Doesn't eat regular foods. He rather his own diet, it tingles his tongue.
Born and raised in Caernival and is completely a risk taker- sometimes..
Though dares and challenges he'll accept, if he knows he'll win.
Does not care for many, and would not carry a conversation if disinterested.
Wouldn't hold back honesty, though thinks carefully before making moves and decisions.
Was a Rogue, became a Cleric for wonderful reasons.
Completely competitive, when he wants to be.
Can be very stubborn - unexpected.
Zimerac.............

My best friend.
Thank you.

The shadows... My heart.

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=192557][COLOR=purple]Ashram[/COLOR][/url]

Quote: "In some regards, aye. The strength of self is a thing I would teach to all. The Gods have seen fit to gift me with a body suited for war, I would do them justice by using it to that purpose, and encouraging others to know the strengths gifted them."

He is a Cleric, but has the strength of a Warrior. Now that's admiring.. Then again, I'm a Warrior, with the qualities of a Rogue.

I've come to the realization, that I really have been slipping on this. I assure you, I will continue to write in you more Diary, I will not neglect you. However.. some of these thoughts.. some of the stories of my turns, I've been feeling like I should keep to myself. And that's completely alright!

I spoke with [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=191246][COLOR=teal]Kairiel[/COLOR][/url] the other turn, didn't know she knew how to dance, that was an interesting thing to find out! We spoke more about it.. Fire Dancing.. could you see me doing that? I think I can do it. I think I can eat fire.

"If you can't wait, Then I can promise I en't teaching. The first of learning such things is to learn patience. Respect the element you're wanting to dance with." - Kai said this. I've been taught by Cody and CSB.. Patience Is A Virtue.

The turn before the last.. I made a mistake. I hurt a new adventurer's feelings. How? Well simple- I caused mischief, though not intentionally; never intentionally. But, I spoke to my best friend about it, and he helped me. He asked;

"Do you know what is nice about wood when it is scratched?"
I said: "No, what is?"
Then he said: "You can repair it with a simple application of varnish, the same with people. Apologize, sincerely, and make amends for your actions and you'll win the man. If he refuses to forgive, then he isn't worthy of your time."

That does make sense.. thank you Nih. I actually sent her a brief apology, and it would seem as though she accepted it! HUZZAH!

[url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=119529][COLOR=red]Bibi[/COLOR][/url]... it felt SO good to see her! I'm happy she invited me to sit and drink with her, and while I was in the mist of training too. Then, she brought to my attention that she fishes. I did not know this! Come to find out, there's more to that fishing history. I can't wait to speak with her again. Though when she first whistled to me, I was shocked to have seen her without her helmet.. though, she quickly placed it back on her head. SO DANG FAST! I thought I was seeing things for a moment. She's... such a beauty. I can't wait to speak with her again.

In other news, Diary, I've learned that pushing people isn't always the best thing to do. When they say no, they really mean NO. I care too much, but I don't care. If you don't like what I'm doing, I will continue to do it because it defines ME, that's who I am. I will not change for no one, especially out of pity. I am LOKI; A Former Bandit, and VERY STRONG WARRIOR. My goal is to protect the lands and the Queen, and so I will train to be strong to do just that!

Highlight of this entire page;
I * A wild Bibi appeared!
II * Nih's Advice.
III * My Warrior Goal.
IV * AND FIRE DANCING!

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow62105.html][COLOR=purple]Aryana Moonsong[/COLOR][/url]

Quote: "I am proud of you, Loki."

Way too many things happened last turn.. it was.. mind blowing! But me and the rest of CSB finally came up with our event for the Frost Fest! Despite the short amount of time, it was done, and the prizes are amazing.

I spoke with my friend, Nih a lot this turn. But the only thing that really came to mind was when he was cooking up a storm! I am curious to see who wins, still. He said some pretty nice words to me.. though, he is my friend! I told him that I would give him a gift, and I did successfully.. dreams really do come true. I thank the shadows, and the gods.

"Have you considered the order?" Nih asked me while holding a strange note.
I replied with a; "Yes I have.. why?"
Then Nih said; "You'll be a perfect Protector, Loki"

Did I melt..? YES I MELTED. And then- it was almost spontaneous.

Aryana spoke to me later on that day, she said I reminded her of my sponsor; Cody Fireblade though I asked her why? And she said;

"You are both loyal, fun, and like him you give off an aura of being approachable. You are a friend to everyone". With a smile.
I felt.. speechless, though I thanked her, afterwards she sung to me, and so I've decided to share the song.


"May your turn end as it did begin, in the company of your friends and kin. May you always hear laughter every where you roam, that always leads you right back to your home

May your life always be filled with light, laughter and love as you wander the lands from the seas to the heavens above. May you always be happy and carefree, never to change and remain as you always shall be

May you always remember your friends and your family, finding comfort in both them and me"

Did I melt again? YES I DID.

During the cooking event, I seen Miranda-Goddess. She's just as I imagined she'd look like, though it was rather amusing watching her float around like that. And Ahh yes, lets not forget about THE ATTACK OF THE SOCKS! All I did was shouted; "Is that your best show?" To the snowmen, but I was not expecting that. Great Show!

Teehee~

QUOTE OF THE TURN: [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=192115][COLOR=purple]Allegra Kinsey[/COLOR][/url]

Quote: "You are certainly an odd sort..."

I know this Allegra, I've been told perhaps probably one thousand times. If even.. regardless? I get asked silly questions as well, such as; "Are you a Girl or Boy?" or "Do you want to be a Girl or Boy?" And if you all truly must know, I intend to be both.~

I've been asked many strange yet intriguing questions, it never fails! I love it! If you have been following up on this public diary of mine, I am sorry for not writing for awhile.. I've been focused on reading another, however, now that this is the last turn before I must return the other, I'll go back to writing.

He asked me something.. Nih asked me; To teach it for him sense he plans not to. Did I accept? OF COURSE I DID. I would do anything for my friend, even buy him a Scepter of Morning Light.. Which I plan to do. Words cannot explain how truly thankful I am to have such a friend in my life! It brings water to my eyes!

I haven't been training.. because well, I've been farming. And NOW I'm sick, so everything has slowed down dramatically. It's almost depressing.. but sense things have calmed, I actually learned that I can live without training.. that it's possible! Thank goodness. At first, I didn't think it twas!

Also, I've come to the conclusion that I have fallen in love. I'm in love with The Shrouded Bunnies Clan Guild.. and I'm happy to say it! I would marry it if I were able to. I'm happy to have family-like Guildmates, and to be surrounded by three special women in my life; [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow62105.html][COLOR=gray]Aryana[/COLOR][/url], [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow23924.html][COLOR=darkgreen]Marron[/COLOR][/url], and [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow97718.html][COLOR=purple]Bebhinn[/COLOR][/url].. I love them so.. and yes, I am aware that love is a powerful word.. I would do anything in my power to protect them.. I am aware that I have more than just those three in the Guild, but I swear tot he gods, I love them, the shadows know! Go on and ask!

I also have a lot of love for my friends as well, especially [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=190543][COLOR=green]Nih[/COLOR][/url], [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=94138][COLOR=blue]Gawain[/COLOR][/url], [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow192391.html][COLOR=red]Burendi[/COLOR][/url], [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow192304.html][COLOR=brown]Apliam[/COLOR][/url], [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/cshow191286.html][COLOR=violet]Achelle[/COLOR][/url], and [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=185847][COLOR=teal]Lillya[/COLOR][/url], and MORE. I thank you all!

I plan to make an IMPACT, and for those who cannot see it, Be Prepared for it. I WILL reach my goal, Lillya knows it. I will make my [url=http://www.darkgrimoire.com/showchar.php?char=178759][COLOR=green]Cody Fireblade[/COLOR][/url] and my Guild proud!

"Expect the unexpected.."